Men love boats. Why do we love boats? Because boats are awesome. They give a sense of freedom and control that isn’t readily available on shore. Unfortunately men also love women, and for some reason all women are not born with our natural love of boats. No idea why, but they just aren't. Getting ladies to come on your boat is a tricky venture, but if you take the time to prepare in advance, you can make the idea irresistible to them.
Here are 5 things you should do before taking ladies on board:
Clean Your Boat (and Yourself)
If you want ladies to love your boat then you better make sure it’s shined up and looking nice. This is no different than it would be if you were picking them up in a car instead. It’s common knowledge that you clean your car first. So it shouldn’t shock that your boat needs to be cleaned too. Ladies want to be able to show off a little, and being seen in an old rusty boat (no matter how much character it has) is unlikely to make them happy. Instead they’d spent the whole trip crunched down hoping nobody sees them.
So if you’re thinking of taking out some ladies, polish it up a bit. Perhaps over time if you bring the same lady on board, she will stop minding as much, but in the beginning you want to make a positive impression. Also make sure to clean yourself up a bit, or even dress up some if you really want to go all out.
Make Sure Your Boat Is Well Stocked
Alright this is important. No matter how nice your boat looks, with no food and drinks the ladies are still not going to be happy. You want to make sure the trip goes by flawlessly, and that means plenty of snacks and plenty of drinks. You can put a cooler in your boat storage box to keep some drinks, and have some food tucked away in a hidden deck storage compartment. This way once you’re out on the water, you can pass the time by sharing some food with the ladies, and perhaps having a glass of wine or three (fun side note: women actually do like to cut loose and have fun from time to time, you just need to give them the opportunity to do so).
Plan Your Adventure (Plan for Spontaneity)
OK prepare to be confused. Ladies love spontaneity. But they also like a man with a plan. Now I know this doesn’t make much sense, nonetheless that’s the way it is. Trying to keep ladies happy is going to take some planning. Over the years I have discovered the secret to doing this. I call it “plan for spontaneity”. To do this, decide on a route ahead of time, scout it out, find the cool abandoned beach that just happens to have an amazing view just a 2 minute walk from the shore, and keep it in mind. Then during your trip you can sound completely nonchalant and relaxed, and when she says “oooh what a pretty beach” as you just happen to cruise by, you can say, “yea! Let’s go check it out”. Then you get on the shore and suggest walking around a bit. You secretly lead her to the amazing view spot that you can see your boat and the whole lake from. Then you pull out a picnic that also just happens to be in your backpack which you had “forgotten” about. Big points right there… Big points indeed. So remember: Plan for Spontaneity.
Check the Weather
This seemingly simple foresight is just so often overlooked by us men. I mean why do we care if it’s raining or sunny? We’re on our boat! It’s going to be great! For some reason ladies just don’t appreciate the boat to the same level. So just to make this a whole lot easier on yourself, check the weather. Just this once.
Be Prepared for Everything
Yes Everything. Boat flips over from a freak storm? Not to worry ladies, I’ve got lifejackets! And waterproof matches! Flares! A waterproof pen and paper! Glow in the dark whistles! Ok you caught me; I’ve secretly always hoped this would happen so I could test all my cool stuff out… (Don’t worry; I’ve also got an emergency satellite cell phone that I’ll use when I finish testing everything). Seriously though, when you take people out on your boat, you are responsible for their safety. Being over prepared will always be in your favor.
Think about all the different things you should keep on board. There’s plenty of space between the fishing poles in the side deck storage bins or next to the cooler in your boat storage box to keep some simple precautionary items. Things like a first aid kit, blankets, extra lifejackets, warm coats, paddles, work gloves, more rope, a life raft, knifes, and the like will all be used at some time or another. If you can show a woman you’re prepared to deal with anything that might come up in order to keep her safe, she’s going to have a hard time not falling for you. Even though there’s no way of knowing for sure what may happen on a boating trip, you should still be prepared.
If you follow these 5 steps to prepare for having ladies on board, you should be more than ready for a killer boat trip. Now just remember to relax, have a good time, and let the trip flow by. You’ve already done the hard work, there is nothing left to deal with (OK I lied. You should still take a shower, use deodorant, and pick her up on time). Once the trip starts though, you will be able to just enjoy the ride, and if you’re relaxed, the ladies will be able to tell, and this will help them to relax as well. Enjoy the boating trip, and help us out by sharing what you learned about boating with ladies when it’s all over.